Thursday, February 21, 2008

all we can do is keep breathing

Do you ever have those days when you wish you just didn't have to care about people? I'm serious. Between my students and the leaders on my team and my volunteers....sometimes I get so overwhelmed with everything going on in everyone else's lives that I wish I just didn't care. But the thing is that I do care--I have to care. I don't know how to not care.

Which is just so burdensome.

It would be easier to not care. But it also would be incredibly selfish. My problem is that not only do I care, I want to solve. I am a fixer. I need to have answers and solutions when things go awry. It is hard to admit that I can't fix most things.

Some days all we can do is keep breathing.

In the midst of all the hellish crap going on around me, all I can do is breathe...in...and out. And pray to God that something breaks, eventually. Because it can't always be this hard, right? It can't always hurt this much to watch people's lives fall apart, right?

Twenty five years is long enough to know that it never gets easier.

1 comment:

Lucas said...

Don't worry honey. Eventually you don't have to reminder yourself to breath.


I mean this both in a profound way, and in a profoundly sarcastic way... at the same time.